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Our Blog

What I Learned From My Mother's Home Funeral

3/24/2018

 
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by Lee Webster
​
I’m standing in the kitchen of our old Vermont farmhouse at the age of 14 with my mother’s eyes boring into mine as she is telling me that under no circumstances will I or any of my four siblings be taking care of her in her old age. She is insisting that, when the time comes, I will take her to a nursing home and boot her out the door.
 
It’s clear to me that talking with her about what she wants to have happen to her body after her death is just not on the table, now or in the future, and I was right about that years later when, despite recurring attempts during her favorite show, NCIS, we never quite got to the point. “Gee, Mom, that looks like a nasty way to die. I wonder if he’ll be buried or cremated? Which do you think you’d prefer? What? Oh, yeah, autopsy first, then we never find out. OK.”


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Holderness NH 03245
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  • Home
  • How To
    • Find Help Fast
    • Learn the Law
    • Have a Home Funeral >
      • State Requirements for Home Funerals
      • New England Legal Requirements
    • Perform Body Care >
      • Cooling Techniques
    • Complete Paperwork
    • Arrange Disposition
    • Transport the Dead
    • Create Ceremony
    • Go Out Greener
    • Pay for a Funeral
    • Work with Professionals
  • Resources
    • Connecticut Resources
    • 2020 Funeral Home Price Survey
    • Memorial Forests
    • Shop Local
    • Tools for Community Education
    • Infographics
    • Sample Forms
    • Side Effects Publishing Website Design
    • Writings, Books, and Forms
    • Stories >
      • Read Their Stories
      • Heidi's Story
      • Penney's Story
      • Kathleen's Story
    • Articles, Interviews, Podcasts, Videos
    • For Professionals
    • Glossary
    • Pandemic Care Guide >
      • Pandemic Care Guide
      • Practical Guidelines
      • Ceremony Resources
      • Articles
      • Covid-19 FAQs
    • FAQs
  • Green Burial
    • Green Burial in NH
    • Green Burial Cemeteries in the US and Canada
    • Start Up Tips for Green Burial Cemeteries
    • 10 Things You Can Say or Do to Promote Natural Burial
    • Offering Green Burial in Your Hybrid Cemetery
    • Natural Burial Bylaw Language
    • Legal Burial Requirements by State
    • New Hampshire Embalming Law
    • Green Burial Survey
    • Photographs
    • Green Burial Books
  • Presentations
    • Find a Speaker
    • Presentation Resources >
      • NHCA
  • Contact